Saying Grace & Having Guests

The weekly dinners are a way of maintaining the family bonds, but we’ve seen over the years this isn’t restricted only to the people who are connected by blood. Instead, it’s those related by blood or love, the might-have-beens and the partners who share life and death situations. We have the strongest indication of what constitutes family for the Reagans through the guests who attend family dinner. After Frank’s speech in The Bitter End, there can be no doubt that their partners are family, “He was my son’s partner, he was a member of our family, as well as the NYPD family”. The dinner is also when they can demonstrate to others what their family is really like; Eddie was certainly stunned after attending her second dinner.

Attendance at family dinner takes on a different significance in light of Frank’s comment in Cutting Losses. Each time someone sits in one of those chairs, they provide us with a gift.

"We are all just passing time. And occupy our chair very briefly." The time we had with Linda was a gift. And we are all the better that she occupied her chair

The Guest List

For most of the people listed here, there’s a good chance they could have a return visit (Sydney’s the exception).

First are the ones who’ve only had a single visit;

• To reflect the celebratory circumstances of Something Blue, Lena joined the family for the pre-wedding dinner
• During The Real Deal, Frank invited Lenny to show him that they aren’t a model family, which worked even if it wasn’t quite what was intended.
• In Triumph Over Trauma, after the traumatic events in the cellar, Baez enjoyed the chance to be part of the family.
• After the original invitation was rejected, it was In the Name of the Father (concluded in Atonement) that saw Paula finally join the family. Frank asked Paula to join them as a condition for convincing Joe to quit the NYPD. Although he would’ve hoped this could demonstrate to Paula that the Reagans weren’t trying to take Joe away from her.
• In Happy Endings, Jack Boyle entered the lions’ den after his and Erin’s weekend away. Jack seemed intent on stirring things up even if he brought gifts.

To finish, it’s the guests who’ve been to a handful of dinners. One of these we should expect to see again, while the other definitely won’t.

• Sydney Davenport was part of the dinner scene in Privilege, Officer Down, and Brothers. Sydney’s attendance was sporadic, as she didn’t take part every week, unlike Eddie. Due to the mythos that has subsequently built up around the significance of family dinner, it seems even more likely that this was a doomed relationship.
• Joe Hill has so far been at dinner in Family Secrets, In the Name of the Father (concluded in Atonement), as well as Justifies the Means. Joe was uncertain when he first joined the family and the second visit saw the arrival of further upheaval. However, it feels like Joe stopped being a guest as of the end of season 11.

Saying Grace

The previous post about family dinner focused on the frequency of saying grace, so I’ll finish this post with a quick update to add the details for seasons 10 and 11. Because of the Reagan family’s strong religious beliefs, the dinner scene often includes them saying a short prayer before eating, and this small act is frequently a point of discussion for some fans. Specifically, how often is this element actually present within an episode? This might be a slightly frivolous look at this representation of the characters’ religion, but it is certainly not intended to insult anyone.

The Results

This is a little frivolous, but here are the seasons ranked by the number of times that grace (or a variant of it) was said at dinner. As there have now been two shorter seasons, they’re ordered based on the percentage; for example, 4 out of 16 episodes or 25% is higher than 5 out of 22, which is approximately 23%.

• Joint 1st (with grace said in 7 out of 22 episodes): season 1 & 8
• 3rd (with grace said in 7 out of 23 episodes): season 3
• 4th (with grace said in 6 out of 22 episodes): season 9
• 5th (with grace said in 4 out of 16 episodes): season 11
• 6th (with grace said in 5 out of 22 episodes): season 5
• Joint 7th (with grace said in 4 out of 22 episodes): season 2, 4 & 6
• 10th (with grace said in 3 out of 19 episodes): season 10
• 11th (with grace said in only 1 episode): season 7

The Details

Even when the family is seen praying at family dinner, it’s not the same every time. Sometimes a scene starts with them already saying it, and other times it ends with them starting to say it. There are even times they say something other than the traditional grace. Below is a list of the 52 episodes where they do any of these things. Also highlighted are those episodes with no opportunity for grace to be said as we don’t actually see them at family dinner.

Season 1

Grace is said in:

• The Pilot (1×1)
• What You See (1×5)
• Chinatown (1×8)
• My Funny Valentine (1×14)
• Age of Innocence (1×16)
• To Tell the Truth (1×18)
• The Blue Templar (1×22)

Exception: there is no dinner scene in Dedication (1×15)

Season 2

Grace is said in:

• Thanksgiving (2×8)
• The Job (2×12)
• No Questions Asked (2×18)
• Mother’s Day (2×22)

Exception: there is no dinner scene in A Night on the Town (2×5)

Season 3

Grace is said in:

• Family Business (3×1)
• Fathers and Sons (3×10)
• Framed (3×12)
• Devil’s Breath (3×21)
• The Bitter End (3×22)
• This Way Out (3×23)
• Scorched Earth (3×4) although Nicky says a Buddhist blessing rather than the traditional prayer.

Exception: the family scene takes place at Nicky’s 16th birthday party rather than family dinner in Old Wounds (3×3)

Season 4

Grace is said in:

• Lost and Found (4×5)
• Bad Blood (4×9)
• Secret Arrangements (4×19)
• Exiles (4×22) although Linda says “Bless these sinners while they eat their dinners” rather than the traditional prayer.

Season 5

Grace is said in:

• Sins of the Father (5×10)
• Home Sweet Home (5×12)
• Love Stories (5×13)
• In the Box (5×16)
• The Art of War (5×22)

Season 6

Grace is said in:

• Worst Case Scenario (6×1)
• Rush to Judgement (6×6)
• Hold Outs (6×9)
• Town Without Pity (6×18)

Season 7

Grace is said in:

• The Thin Blue Line (7×22)

The only other episode they come close to saying grace is in Lost Souls (7×15) but instead they raise a toast to Joe.

Season 8

Grace is said in:

• Cutting Losses (8×1)
• Brushed Off (8×6)
• Legacy (8×15)
• Close Calls (8×17)
• Your Six (8×20)
• The Devil You Know (8×21)
• My Aim is True (8×22)

Season 9

Grace is said in:

• Playing with Fire (9×1)
• Trust (9×6)
• By Hook or By Crook (9×7)
• My Brother’s Keeper (9×14), the second dinner scene
• Common Enemies (9×19)
• Mind Games (9×3) although Eddie has jumbled it up.

Exception: there is a wedding rehearsal dinner rather than the normal family dinner in Something Blue (9×22)

Season 10

Grace is said in:

• Another Look (10×4)
• Bone to Pick (10×10)
• Family Secrets (10×19)

This was a shortened season so it’s hard to guess how many more times they might have said grace, but as of episode 19, they’d said it as many times as they had at the same point in seasons 2 and 4.

Season 11

Grace is said in:

• Triumph Over Trauma (11×1)
• Guardian Angels (11×11)
• Happy Endings (11×12)
• Justifies the Means (11×16)